All posts for the month July, 2009

The Joy Of Milking

Published July 16, 2009 by glaumland

OK, I have to admit that I was not looking forward to doing the milking this morning. It really isn’t that much of a chore, because we only have the one goat; but this morning, I just wasn’t in the mood.

The whole milk goat experiment came about because Dear Hubby wanted milk cows. I have been around long enough to know how much work that is. I PUT MY FOOT DOWN! There was no way I was going to be a dairy farmer, even on a small scale. (Don’t forget, you don’t just need a cow, there has to be some bovine sex involved once a year, plus the fun of raising a bottle calf…no way, no how!)

However, Dear Hubby finally wore me down. We were spending so much money on milk, now that kids are getting bigger, and the grocery budget definitely was taking a hit. And I hate doing dishes. We haven’t had a dishwasher since 94. So Hubby told me that if I let him get a dairy goat, he’d buy me a dishwasher. Wow, a fair trade-off, at least  until I realized he wanted the dishwasher to sterilize milk bottles. Humph!

Needless to say, I broke down on the goats. One goat was lonely, so we got another goat. Then finding a buck to breed to can be tough, so now we have another goat. I’m beginning to notice a pattern here.

OK, back to my original thought…I didn’t feel like milking today.

But the cats love milking time and think that the goat is the most wonderful person on the planet (next to me, of course). So it is always fun to see them come running when they hear me with the feed and milking equipment. Baron Von Broccoli was so excited this morning he actually followed me to the goat pen. It was funny to walk back to the house – me in the lead, followed by the goat, followed by the cat. Quite a parade!

So we get settled in for the milking. I’ve been having some trouble this year with my left hand. Don’t know if it is the fibromyalgia or what. Anyway, I’ve been frustrated (and so has the goat) by my inability to get a good stream and rhythm going. So this morning I tried switching hands (which isn’t just a matter of switching sides) and viola! It worked. I’ll try it again tonight to see if it was just a fluke.

Finally, milking is all done, and it’s time for some lovey-dovey time with the goat. This is a nice, quiet time for petting the goat and telling her how wonderful she is. Unfortunately, she landed a few goat kisses on my face, which in and of themselves aren’t so bad. But goats like poison ivy, and I’m highly allergic to poison ivy, so I may be walking around with a disfigured face for a while. Oh well…it was worth it.

Until next time…


Going Through A Change Of Life

Published July 15, 2009 by glaumland

Ha! At my age you’d probably think the ‘change of life’ topic had something to do with menopause. But not in Glaumland – thanks to my gyn and a lovely hysterectomy, that’s all behind me (or always with me?) now.

No, this change of life has to do with our computer connection. We’ve been on dial-up for years, which has been a pain considering the phone company is still using the old United Telephone network (never heard of it – lucky for you!). So the phone situation has been barely tolerable, but a necessary evil.

See, here in Glaumland, we have another problem. We live in the bottom of a hole. We’re at the bottom of a draw, living next to a nice creek that drain about 160 acres. And where there are creeks, there are really big trees. Which means that cell phone service is lousy here, too.

The good part of all of this is we aren’t bothered by lots of extraneous phone calls. Ha, I wish. The hippies call all of the time (our name for Scientologists) even though we have asked them REPEATEDLY to stop.

So I will be exploring the options for higher speed internet. It’s kind of an exciting thought, being able to connect faster than 56k. Imagine that! I might actually get more blogging done.

Until next time…

Crazy Like A ‘Cuda

Published July 6, 2009 by glaumland

I was surprised, like so many other people last Friday, that Alaska Governor Sarah Palin decided to resign from office. I really didn’t know anything about Gov. Palin until she stepped onto the national stage last summer, but I have to admit I’ve been a fan since that time. She is a very classy, beautiful Christian woman who has been successful in life and politics. Unfortunately, those are the very reasons why the MSM and many liberals hate her.

There have been many reasons thrown out in cyberspace as to why she has decided to leave the governorship before her term was up: issues about family, health or politics, and my favorite – a big scandal about to erupt. I really don’t think any scandal is brewing; most people with families and jobs just don’t have time to get in trouble! It’s hard enough finding time to cook, get laundry & dishes done, do homework, get to ball games and doctor appointments, and the list goes on…

But I really couldn’t fault her if she is out of politics for good. She has been so maligned by the media that it is a wonder she doesn’t break down in tears or lash out in anger. That’s probably how I would respond. Instead she has continued to be classy yet bold in her retorts, getting her point across while staying far above the cess-pool of behavior that MSM likes to swim in.

Perhaps the most disgusting and repulsive item was posted on the Huffington Post:

Huffpo article titled, “Palin Will Run in ‘12 on More Retardation Platform.” reads as follows:

In Sarah Palin’s resignation announcement she complained about the treatment of her son Trig who always teaches her life lessons. She said that the “world needs more Trigs, not fewer.” That’s a presidential campaign promise we can all get behind. She will be the first politician to actually try to increase the population of retarded people.

To me, it’s kinda like saying the world needs more cancer patients because they teach us such personal lessons.

Her first act as President: To introduce a Pre-K lunch buffet that includes lead paint chips. Sort of a Large HEAD-START Program.

She will then encourage women to hold off on pregnancies until their 40’s just to mix up some chromosomes.

She now is in favor of abortion only in case of diploid birth.
Her policies will increase jobs because Wal-Mart is building new stores each day and someone has to be the greeter.


It seems that even Huff-Po thought this was too much – they pulled the article. The real problem to me is that anyone, especially someone who claims to be a journalist, would be stupid enough to write this in the first place. I guess the liberal media should think twice about who they designate to represent them. I definitely applaud Palin and her attorney, Thomas Van Flein, for taking a stand and threatening legal repercussions to  anyone who propagates or publishes this kind of crap.

If Palin has left her office to focus on her family, kudos to her! Too many people in the national spotlight seem to put their own interests and opportunities ahead of their family commitments. One has only to look at a string of divorces and infidelities to see this happening.

I think that the real reason this has caused such an uproar in the MSM and the political arena is that it just doesn’t make sense – to them. They are used to seeing politics played out in the manner that we are unfortunately too accustomed to. They can’t understand it, so they deride and ridicule it. But I think that their behavior is caused by more than confusion, I really believe that they fear her. They don’t understand her Christian ethics and behaviors; it just doesn’t fit their idea of ‘normal.’ Well, thank goodness for that.

So I wish Sarah Palin all the luck in the world in whatever she decides to do. My thoughts and prayers will go with her and her family.

Don’t Misunderestimate The Power Of Petard

Published July 1, 2009 by glaumland

One of the most challenging aspect of my profession as a veterinarian is communication. Imagine that! I never really understood that, until I realized that pets don’t carry credit cards. Ha!

As is turns out, as a learner I am very visual, as well as tactile. I’ve got to see it and feel it to understand it. If you’ve ever seen me explain things to clients, I’m constantly scribbling on the back of paper or gesticulating wildly in trying to get my message across. I think (hope) that this works for most people, but it definitely works for me: I really enjoy the education part of my job.

Sometimes when I’m trying to talk to clients, I get stuck on trying to NOT use the super-long 50 cent per word term that they won’t understand. Then the goal becomes to find a word that is understandable AND professional. But sometimes I wonder if it just can’t be done.

{One of my children’s favorite PBS shows “Wordgirl.” My idol is Lady Redundant Woman. I’ve learned never to misunderestimate her ability to do evil! (Maybe I should become Dr Redundant Vet – has a nice ring to it!)

Gooey. This is one of my tough words. When I say this to anybody, they know exactly what I mean (some sort of a liquid mucoid discharge). Then there is soupy, which is liquid with stuff in it but not as thick as gooey. If we add a -y to the end of pus, you get another type of discharge that we will write on the charts but not say out-loud. Heaven forbid we have blood in this mix, and we have to try to explain to clients about the mucopurulohemorrhagic dischage – that’s worth at least $1.75, even if the client goes ‘huh?’ Just so much easier to tell them that it is a brownish, gooey, soupy pus. They get the idea.

(Describing smell that go along with discharges can be even more fun, but only for those clients who have strong stomachs. Most fun of all is when you get the discharge all over the place – hooo-ee!) Are you with me here?

Former President George Bush 43 was often maligned for waterboarding words. He had some real doozies, but you do have to understand – that’s the way TX people talk. At least, real TX people talk that way. But far from browbeating him about his lovely words, he should have been heralded as a great communicator. After all, the most important thing about words is the person you speak them to understands them. Otherwise, it’s just jibberish.

Some people like to use fancy words that no-one understands (and sometimes not even them!). Several weeks ago Obama mentioned that Democracy and its freedoms are not things to be hoisted on other countries. (Bold words are exact). You can hoist a flag, hoist a beer, and even hoist a petard, but I hardly think we want to put American ideals so high that they can’t be obtained by anyone else.

So perhaps Obama meant foisted, which means to get someone to accept something by using deceit. Rather that clearly explaining that clearly so that everyone could understand, he tried to show off his Harvard education. A mistake like that would have meant an ‘F’ in my high school composition class.

And speaking of hoisting petard, I bet less than 5% of America understands Shakespearian English, but who knows what a petard is, anyway? A petard is an old French word for a small bomb that was used to blow up gates and walls. Unfortunatelly for the hoister, he usually got blown up himself. The funniest bit about petard is that it is derived from the older French, Latin and Greek words meaning ‘to break wind’ (farting for you and me!).

So to get hoisted with your own petard – that would mean getting blown up by your own bomb, or possibly gaining altitude following a big bowl of chili. Some people know how to foist their petard though, and have many ways to leave their gas issues for someone else to deal with.

One of my favorite Bushisms is the word ‘misunderestimated.’ He got lots of flackfrom the media for that one. But they, along with the Democrats, should really have figured out by now what it means. After all, the Obama administration has made an art form out of misunderestimating unemployment and deficits this year, so I’m thinking they already seated a ‘Misunderestimation Czar’.

Another one of my favorite words is ‘disinclude.’ Many purists would just say to use the word ‘exclude.’ but we can’t learn anything from that word other than something or someone gets left out. But if we ‘disinclude’ someone, that means we thought about including then, and then decided to purposefully leave them out. See the difference?

Lately as I have pondered words and communication, I realized that it isn’t about using fancy or even ‘correct’ words; it IS about having your audience understand what you are trying to say. So when I say that Obama has alot of semi-half-baked ideas, you should understand that not only was the idea not properly thought through (the cake was still gooey inside) but it didn’t even have a proper beginning point (the stove never got turned on). Do you see what I mean?

Words have power: the power to share thoughts, ideas and feelings.  We must all use our word power for good and not evil. So says Dr. Redundant Vet.

 Until next time…