Food

All posts tagged Food

Look Who Is Crying Over Spilt Milk — Or The Danger Dairy Fairy Tale

Published September 24, 2011 by glaumland

Well, here’s an OMG post for today.

http://hotair.com/archives/2011/02/05/epa-to-regulate-dairy-milk-spills-as-per-oil-spills/

http://www.thecompletepatient.com/storage/WIorder-clarification9-11.pdf

 

Once upon a time, in the land of the free and the home of the brave (and the rest of the world for that matter), there was this amazing substance called ‘milk.’ So magical was this liquid, that it was fed to the babies of many & varied creatures in the animal kingdom known as ‘mammals.’ More wonderful than water, milk was composed of proteins, fats and sugars, vitamins, minerals & water, the basic nutrients needed to keep the infants alive. So important were these nutrients, that female mammals actually had a way to produce and store milk until it was needed by their young. After the babies grew up and were able to find their own food supply, the mothers quit producing this ‘milk’ until it was needed by the next round of offspring. Some mothers produced extra milk, much more than their young ones needed, and these became known as ‘dairy’ animals.

How blessed the mammals felt to have this ‘liquid nutrition.’ Humans, too, recognized the importance of milk. The starry path in the night sky was called The Milky Way. The Promised Land was referred to as the Land of Milk & Honey. Even acts of generosity were recognized as ‘the milk of human kindness.’

The wise people of the kingdom realized how precious this milk was and they looked for different ways to share with others and keep it for future use. They discovered contamination, fermentation, & coagulation, and they called their products ‘cheese,’ ‘buttermilk,’ & ‘cottage cheese.’ Other learned people developed the processes of pasteurization & homogenization to keep the milk safe & creamy. Best of all, a method called ‘refrigeration’ was invented and people learned just how good milk was when chilled or frozen! Some humans would stand in lines at a store to buy this milk, others would pay to have it delivered fresh to their homes.

The people in the kingdom rejoiced. “Happy Cows” (California Milk Advisory Board) were celebrated and Dairy Princesses were appointed. Many dairy lovers would greet each other in the street by saying, “Got Milk?” Meanwhile word spread quickly in the kingdom: “Milk – It Does a Body Good,” (National Dairy Council); “It Builds Bonnie Babies,” (Glaxo Dried Milk); and “Drinka Pinta Milka Day,” (Milk Marketing Board).

But the glory of the dairy days could not last forever. Soon, nannies (those all-knowing dears who only want to do what is in your best interest) complained that this ‘milk’ could be dangerous, so the lords and justices of the kingdom passed legislations and regulations to make the glorious liquid safer for storage and comsumption. And the people of the kingdom rejoiced, although these new rules made the kingdom’s milk more costly and less tasty.

After much study and contemplation, the wisest of the people in the kingdom discovered that these new dairy processes destroyed some of the nutrients in this glorious milk, and the nannies said, “The children need these nutrients that the milk used to have!” So the lords and justices of the kingdom passed more legislations and regulations to add ingredients back into the milk, calling their new product ‘fortified.’ And the people of the kingdom once again rejoiced, even though it required more coins to buy this milk and it tasted even worse than before.

Years passed, and the people of the kingdom still felt blessed by this ‘fortified’ milk (even though it was so bland and costly), and many infants grew into adulthood and then raised their children with this milk. But there were rabble-rousers that began to rumble in the kingdom that they did not want this ‘fortified’ milk from these dairy creatures. So the rousers went to the wise people and instructed them to find a nutritious liquid from other sources. And the wise people, being of course very ingenious, found this liquid and the called it ‘soy milk.’ However, only some of the people in the kingdom rejoiced, as the ‘soy milk’ tasted strange and required them to exchange even more coins.

However, in parts of the kingdom were people who remembered the old ways and honored the dairy mammals. They grumbled at all of the changes that had been made to milk and wanted their glorious milk to come straight from the magical mothers; this milk they called ‘raw.’ And these grumblers went out into the kingdom and gathered these divine dairy creatures to themselves, drinking the ‘raw’ milk without pasteurization and homogenization and fortification. And these people rejoiced and no longer grumbled, for they felt renewed and invigorated by all of the nutrients in their special milk that was so tasty and cost very few coins.

But the nannies, DOING good because only THEY know what IS good, saw these happy people drinking their milk from their dairy animals and exclaimed: “They can’t do that!” The lords stood idly by, worrying about their own lands, jingling the kingdom’s purses and thinking about ways to spend the peoples’ tax monies. The justices agreed with the nannies; ‘raw’ milk was dangerous and the common people must be protected from themselves. So the justices passed new laws stating that people could not drink ‘raw’ milk from their own dairy creatures, nor could they sell their milk to others without complying with the legislations and regulations of the kingdom. And the nannies rejoiced but the grumblers began to grumble once again.

How does this dairy-tale end? If you listen closely, you can hear the grumbling growing louder. But we’ll have to wait and see…

Until next time…

Parenting Help From Oscar Mayer

Published May 25, 2011 by glaumland

Little Boy is in one of those phases where it seems like he is a bottomless pit. Well, not quite bottomless…he fills up in about 5 minutes but then he’s hungry 1 hour later. After filling up on fruit and bowls of cereal, his next favorite is sandwiches. Especially turkey sandwiches.

We get the kind of lunch meat that comes in the little round plastic packages where the bottom peels off. We always stock up when there’s a sale.

Then last week the unthinkable happened…we ran out of turkey. I offered to make Little Boy a bologna sandwich and he said he didn’t like bologna. Yeah, right. Who doesn’t like that lunch meat processed from bits and pieces of different farm animals? Yummy!

So I decided to make him a sandwich, and while I was constructing the sandwich it popped into my mind to sing the bologna song. You know…

My bologna has a first name, it’s O-S-C-A-R…

My bologna has a second name, it’s M-A-Y-E-R…

Oh, I love to eat it every day

And if you ask me why I’ll say

‘Cause Oscar Mayer has a way with B-O-L-O-G-N-A.

Little Boy was intrigued by the song, so I had to sing it a couple of times until he learned the words and the tune. And by that time the sandwich had been eaten.

It was a great Mom moment thanks to Oscar Mayer. And if we ever have a problem with hot dogs, I’ve already got a plan.

Until next time…

Hamburgers Don’t Grow On Trees

Published February 20, 2011 by glaumland

Little Boy was enjoying a hamburger the other day. Looking at the seeds on top of the bun, he suggested that we plant them so we could have a tree with all of the hamburgers we want. My two thoughts…how cute, and I wish.

We were driving for a while on the road to go see family, so we went thru a drive-thru restaurant. We don’t usually indulge, but Little Boy is going thru a growth spurt and is constantly hungry these days. And when you’re a little boy and hungry, there isn’t time to wait.

Luckily, there are lots of items on the dollar menu to choose from. Good thing, because that’s about all we can afford these days. It seems between the gasoline, the groceries and the electric bill, my checking account is running low earlier in the month than usual. We’re watching for sales a lot more closely, as well as stocking up on generic food and lots of potatoes and rice to stretch meals out.

The government may say the economy is doing better, but I disagree. I still know too many people without jobs. The price of everything is going up. Even the feed for the critters is going up, which means it is costing us more to feed ourselves. And as long as there is no extra money to spend, there is no recovery. Economics for Dummies, legislators need not apply.

I wish hamburgers grew on trees. I know how to grow trees.

Until next time…

Ronald McDonald Captured By Food Terrorists…Buy More Fries!

Published February 5, 2011 by glaumland

Ronald McDonald

OMG! What is this world coming to?

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1353729/Ronald-McDonald-held-hostage-food-campaigners-chilling-spoof-Al-Quaeda-style-video.html?ITO=1490

This is part of an advertising campaign of the Food Liberation Army of Finland. I’m guessing that it really isn’t Ronald that they are after, but more transparency when it comes to food ingredients and business practices in the fast food industry. The question is: does this kind of stupid stunt work? Sure, they are likely to get some attention, but will their message get through or will they be branded as nutters and get dismissed?

But you know, I’ve got demands, too. I want more food included on the dollar menu. I want McD’s to keep in all the flavor & texture of their french fries but get rid of the calories. I like getting large unsweetened iced teas for a dollar. And I want bigger breakfast burritos, still for a dollar.

But hey, shouldn’t somebody call Burger King and tell him to be on the look-out for danger?

Until next time…